I just wanted to share with you all that finally, after some major ups and downs in my private life and in training I managed to reach some cycling happiness!
I started this season in November by breaking my bike’s rear mech hanger, which took over two weeks to find a replacement. Together with some job related problems and switching apartments it was not going according to plan since the very beginning. Then, within the next two months I was sick for a total of over three weeks. Then came some failed workouts… My motivation was getting lower…
Then someone ate a bat… you all know the story… and this meant no outside riding and no group rides, to which I was looking forward. I totally lost the will to ride, not to mention suffering throug sessions of TR.
This lasted for some weeks. In fact the entire month of March and some part of April were a real struggle.
I decided to do something different for a change: some online group rides and racing – a new thing for me. To my surprise I learned that though I’m surely not the fastest one there is, far from it in fact, I can handle more than I thought possible. That was nice.
Last weekend I decided to give “traditional” riding it another go and since we are now allowed to cycle outdoors solo I planned a route and just went. Of course, being me and trying to go too fast as well as not taking anything to eat I bonked so hard on the way home I could bearly ride straight… it didn’t matter though.
Surprisingly, during that ride something clicked into place and I was the happiest I’ve been for a long time. I just kept riding, enjoying the sun and the road.
Thus I decided it is time to come back and to start a new TR plan. So in a ramp test it turned out my FTP improved and reached the same level as in August last year but having lost some weight my W/kg is better and I now know that probably I’ve been holding myself back being afraid to suffer more.
Why am I writing this? I just felt the need to tell people that I am happy. That cycling brings joy. And I wish you all the best too. 
P.S.
Please keep your fingers crossed that another of my attempts at becoming a faster cyclists bears some fruit.
P.P.S.
It’s also new bike week. I finally took the plunge and something new is coming along and its aero.