Waxed my chain for unbound, replaced it on my bike and struggled the whole race with it making noise/coming off when I shifted up hills(sorta important at that race). came home and discovered i had it over the tab on the tension pulley.
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I used conical spacers when installing a caliper on a (new to me) SID fork. I applied torque with maybe 3 threads engaged and promptly stripped out the mount (previous fork was designed for 160mm rotors).
I also learned that day that magnesium alloy is not a particularly fun metal to install helicoils.
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I have installed a MTB tire backwards twice in a rowā¦ Mounted many cross tires backwards, including some challenge HTLRs last weekā¦ I have raced a few seasons of cross and mtb with backwards tires due to total apathy towards it, same for road tires. I am an idiot apparently.
I sheared off a Ti bolt on some MTB brakes 2 days before a major race. Set the torque wrench to 3nm, well below the torque spec and the damn thing sheared before I even hit resistance.
I once installed a pedal on the wrong side of a crank on my fat bike, luckily noticed before I gave the crank a good spin.
Spent 2 days trying to index an XT derailleur, finally brought it to the shop and they noticed I hadnāt aligned that little keeper tab.
In a fit of rage with some MTB brakes I ripped the hydraulic tubing out of the frame only to find it was not internally routed and spent a week trying to fish it all through with a shop vac and string.
Iāve cut more derailleur cables and chains too short too many times to count.
Cracked some carbon bars tightening the lock on grips too much.
Iāve spent hours trying to get a brake to bleed well only to find the piston cracked in the caliper.
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Will you be my mechanic?
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When you have a fleet of bikes numbering in the teens, and replace one or two out of that fleet every year or two, you are going to make some mistakes. Between the wife and I it currently is, 4x cyclocross bikes, 3x road bikes, 4x mountain bikes, 1x gravel bike, 2x fat bikes plus a bunch of churn over the last 15 years.
When I wheel a bike into the shop, they are usually ready to laugh at me. Whatever I need, I know exactly what needs to be done, I just have spent 4 hours dorking it up so bad I am at a loss of how to do it.
Never remove the top cap from a fox damper, you will spend an aggravating amount of time putting it all back together. This summer I discovered on the grip sl damper there are 3x of the smallest ball bearings you have ever seen, and they need to be placed into the correct detents to make it all work, there are 6 options, only 3 are right. Fortunately, fox doesnāt publish any of the information on where they go. After I got it all resolved, I asked the shop what the correct way to do it is, I was met with, āwell, now I will just call you, because we screw it up all the time and do what you just did.ā
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Was installing a new dropper post on my mtb with internal cable routing. After I cut the old cable out, I immediately pulled the housing out of the frame. I was planning to run a new housing, but really would have been nice to use the old housing to pull the new one in.
Probably took me an extra hour to fish the new housing in.
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A few years ago I drove to an out-of-town cyclocross camp. I threw some new tires on the day before I left and ignored one of the cardinal rules of cycling, i.e. never mess with gear right before a ride.
When I got there, I rolled up to the coach for the weekend (a domestic pro), and he said āNice to meet you. Your tires are on backwardā.
I felt like an idiot - which sums up my CX skills quite nicely.
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Iāve heard of someone using a star-nut in a carbon steerer tube. I am unwilling to name names however.
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A few weeks ago I ordered a SRAM XX Eagle SL chain prewaxed from Silca.
I pulled off my factory chain and held them next to each other for length and counted the links twice.
I still proceeded to cut off one link too many. Iāll probably take a few more off and add in an extra power lock.
I have a 3rd chain the dealer threw in as part of my bike sale, but havenāt shortened it yet. Not looking forward to it.
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Ive done that a few times with slick road tyres and whilst I donāt think it makes a difference, vanity has got to me and Iāve corrected it after a ride or two. With nobbly tyre though it might make difference and Iāve been very careful not to make that mistake with my gravel bike.
But hey at least the labels were lined up with the valves. Itās about looks ā¦ yes?
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Ha! Yes, I believe the term is āconfidently incorrectā.
I still donāt know how, but I had a chain do that MID RIDE!
I heard that grinding noise mid ride, and wondered what was wrong. Eventually I stopped and took a better look and found the āmistakeā. I felt like a total idiot, thinking I did it wrong and was riding it for who knows how long. I know better! Popped the link and fixed it on the side of the road.
Only for it to happen again, mid ride. I canāt remember now if it was the same ride or very soon after. But I 100% know I didnāt remove the chain between the rides. Somehow, and I donāt know how, the chain bounce into that position.
That was pretty much the straw that broke the back on my ātime for a new bikeā decision. There were other signs, but that was the last straw.
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You know, they do sell derailleurs independently from a whole new bike. 
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And way way cheaper and quicker to get sorted. 
Remembered one from last year. Was waxing up a batch of fresh chains. I had shortened one already and instead of sizing the second one I decided to just lay it on the ground and take off the amount of links I removed from the other one. Only it wasnāt the other one, it was the one I already shortened. I know I can just throw in a second quick link and use it but bought a third chain anyway. Whenever I go 12spd on my tri bike Iāll probably just make it a trainer chain.
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Rear tyre a bit worn too 
Donāt worry - your in good company - doesnāt take much to persuade us we need a new bike 
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First time I replaced a chain I installed it on the wrong side of that tab in the cage.
I also installed a tire backwards, took it off, made sure everything was oriented properly, and proceeded to install it backwards again.
Installed an eThirteen 9-45 Race Helix cassette. Took me 3+ days and countless hours. To this day I still donāt know what I did wrong. Biggest PITA ever.
On the automobile side of the house, I rotated tires on my wifeās van but apparently didnāt fully tighten one all the way. (I blame the kids rushing me to go somewhere 
). Several weeks later she called saying the car was making a horrific knocking sound. $600 later we have a new CV joint and some mechanics who Iām sure are still laughing about it.
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This one is magnificent
3 Likes