Well…
Let me see if I can contribute with some ideas.
Single dad here, (not a dad that is single, but a dad with a 9yo kid who needs special attention and sees his mom every 3 to 6 months if he’s lucky, I learned that I actually had to start making that distinction), and training is something that I always struggle with.
You just need to be VERY realistic with how much time you can spend on the bike.
I can only follow a low volume plan, and have to workout in the afternoon when I get home, or weekends, and my kid uses that time for his online tournaments of whatever game is on.
The important thing as it was said here countless times, is to focus on the family and coordinate with your family the time you can spend training, and find activities for them to follow whilst you are training.
Another good idea that I followed in the past with my last girlfriend, was something that most couples forget or just feel guilty about: ME time. I used my ME time to train or race, and would give her the same amount of time per week for her to spend time on herself, doing shopping, spa’s, friends, and shared the time with my kid.
So why not do the same with your spouses? In exchange for time to train/race, give them time for them to do something important to them, and you entertain the kids.
Balance and coordination. If you demand time for yourselves, do the same for your spouses.
If I spend and afternoon in a bbq with some friends, and my kid is here having the most boring day of his life (his words ), next day, I give him the same amount of hours to spend time with me doing whatever he wants! Which usually means some kind of online tournament for hours, and I just learned to love to spend time with him…
Next step, is to show him the outdoors and exercise so we can spend more time together away from game consoles and TV’s, which is a brutal challenge for him, as he was taught to avoid outside (not by me) and be afraid of absolutely everything, think of a 9yo afraid to ride an elevator/escalator because he can die because it moves too fast, and shakes with fear every time we have to go up 1 floor in the supermarket and has to ride the escalator.
But that is the next challenge for me and the therapist…