Philuminati - Phil Gaimon's NEW RULES OF CYCLING

Saw this and had to share it. Much prefer Phil’s rules!


Not a fan of Phil but I can get behind these rules. I agree with him… The original “Rules” were supposed to be tounge-in-cheek. That is what was lost on many people. I’m still going to rag on my buds about something they may wear, but I don’t care what number rule it is, and ultimately don’t actually care if they show up wearing pro kit. The new EF kit is sick…rock it if you got it.


I have the original book and it is funny but def meant to be funny not taken seriously lol. I can back Phils new 11 rules those especially rule 11!

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I like the new rules, but as a sports uniform aficionado I have to say matching kit (and good kit design) is something I think is important!

I like rule 9 and rule 11, but disagree with rule 10 because it flies directly in the face of Rule 5, which is the one Rule I actually remember and by which I generally abide.

I also like “We wave to each other… even triathletes.”

I have and love the original book and also bought the audio book. I love it and laugh my ass off every time I think about it.

I will still laugh by the old rules and do believe a ton are great. But these are a great addition!

The orignial Velominati is funny for those who are into cycling and understand irony; others would interpret the rules literally. I still rate Velominati second to the “Official Rules of the Euro Cyclist”, which definitely has got a think layer of irony on it:

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They’re inside jokes, with all the normal impact that every inside joke has. If you’re “inside”, you get to laugh and feel all the warm fuzzies of an implied shared experience. If you’re not, they’re confusing at best, and gatekeeping at worst. :woman_shrugging:

The first “rule” I encountered (at least that was identifiable as a rule to somebody on the “outside”) was #5, because somebody posted a comment that was just Rule 5. My reaction was what the heck is rule 5 (i.e. confusion), and I googled, found the rest, thought they were hilarious, and upvoted the comment. If the same person had posted HTFU, I would have thought they were sort of a jerk and moved on. Somebody on the “inside” would have read the same comment and giggled a bit, because they get the joke.

The rules are obviously tongue-in-cheek, so references to the rules are tongue-in-cheek by extension. If you don’t get the reference (and there’s no other context to help you out), you won’t get that it’s tongue-in-cheek. Inside jokes gonna inside joke.

Amen. Didn’t want to be a FKW so bought the hi-vis pink jersey from their core range. It is bright :sunglasses: