I like most of your process goals and if you can stick to it you will get results.
A lot of people here recommend using MyFitnessPal to estimate their calories in/out. Find a TDEE calculator to get an idea of your target calories for the day, weigh your food (at least for a couple of weeks) to see where you might be going wrong. I suspect you know donuts/cookies don’t help but seeing the numbers helps to quantify it.
Spread your meals, drink a good amount of water each time you eat and have lots of vegetables.
One note of caution. You want a 500-1000 defecit on rest days but this could leave you too depleted. If you are disciplined you may struggle to meet your calorie goals on hard workout days. If you compound that with an overly ambitious defecit the day after too you are setting yourself up to fail - either by not completing future workouts or in failing your nutrition plans and bingeing.
Another good piece of advice if you have a sweet tooth is to find snacks which are low calorie but still feel like a treat. I have hot chocolate powder in the house which comes out at 100cal when made with water and jelly (jello for muricans) pots which are 6cal each.