Sounds like we love it equally but that you have a hard time with dosing and timing. I get it, when I go off the rails I usually go all in. But, personally it’s the law of diminishing returns for me. If I find that I need it during the day, for example, it usually means something else is going on that I should address first. Zero judgement from me, to be clear, it sounds like enjoying it occasionally works best for you.
I only use when riding when trying to facilitate a recovery ride, I love it for that purpose. But a serious ride when I need my wits, it’s not enjoyable for me. I have a severe sweet tooth by default, cannabis just elevates that. I call it the 10pm shit show. I know that reaching for a treat that late doesn’t serve me well so I try to avoid it, I just keep most of it out of the house, but honestly it’s a habit I struggle with (sugar intake in general) so it goes beyond cannabis intake for me. Keeping seltzer water on hand is helpful. I’ll also drink herbal teas instead of the sweet treat.
A lot of what we’re looking for is that reward for being an adult in our society, at least that’s what it is for me. When you can find healthy alternatives for those rewards centers, it’s a win.